As the days pass the people begin to grow restless. Rather than taking the time to know God through His revealed Word, they craft their own version of Yahweh and decide for themselves how he will be worshipped and known. The account of this is astonishing. Notice that in Exodus 32, this golden calf that is molded from gold is not called Baal or any other foreign god name. This calf is called Yahweh. Aaron leads the people in giving credit to this "created god" for their rescue from Egypt. In addition, a worship feast is played for none other than Yahweh, whom they will choose to worship the way they want to worship him, with pagan dancing and activities that they have learned from the world. They aren't claiming to worship a false god, they think they are worshipping the one true God. These people, in their own ignorance, believe they are worshipping the God who is on the mountain, but their worship and knowledge is based on THEIR ideas, emotions and reasoning, not on God's Word.
Have you ever been guilty of the same thing? Have you ever allowed your understanding of God to be shaped by your own reasoning, your own thoughts, your own ideas and your own emotions? Have you ever heard people disregard truths about God by saying "I just can't believe in a God who would do things that way"? Are you guilty of believing things about God that others have told you but that aren't rooted in His Word? Have you been worshipping a calf in your mind, rather than worshipping Yahweh? Have you chosen to "know" God through your own reasoning, rather than taking the time to search the depths of who He is in His Word? Are you sure what you think about God is the same thing that God says about Himself?
I know for myself, especially over the past 5 years or so, that I have had to wrestle with hard truths about who God is and how He runs His universe. It's hard to believe, at times, in a God who judges people with hell, in a God who allows evil and suffering to wreck lives, in a God who does things differently then I would choose to. One thing I've learned though over the years though, I'm thankful that I worship a God who isn't the type of god I would create. I'm thankful that as I search the Scripture to know God more, He ends up being everything that my sinful, selfish, arrogant, prideful self doesn't want him to be. He is a God who loves holiness, who won't let me stay in my sin, who forgives others as much as He forgives me, who is concerned about His own glory more than He is mine, who is concerned with dealing with Satan, sin, pain and suffering in His own timing. I'm thankful for a God who is infinitely better than anything I could ever craft out of gold in my mind. He is everything that I would do differently. And I'm eternally grateful for that.
Let us not be guilty of worshipping a god who doesn't exist. Let us instead shape our minds, deepen our knowledge and worship in truth as we understand the God who has rescued us supernaturally from sin. Know God through His Word. Be challenged when the God you find is something you didn't expect. Be encouraged when you find God doing things you wouldn't do. A God who is hard to understand at times makes more sense than a god we create.